Only You
by artemisgoddess16
Summary: Carlisle/Esme. The story of Esme and Carlisle's beginning pure fluff COMPLETE
1. Esme

_Esme_

_**1907**_

" _Doctor Cullen I was wondering if I might ever see you again?" He smiled generously at my childish attempts at being subtle._

"_Well Ms. Platt, I had no idea you'd taken such an interest in my son Edward." My blush eagerly colored my face in loud shades of red. I was positively mortified by his incorrect assumptions. Edward was a very nice young man, devilishly handsome in a way, but he was a mere 5 years older than me. The only companionship I wanted from him was a friendship, I would never ask him to be my lover, unlike Doctor Cullen. Oh the passion I held for him in my young body! He was the Abelard to my Heloise, the Christopher Brandon to my Marianne Dashwood, the most charming, fantastic and splendid man I had ever met! It was truly a shame he was not married yet, however that small thought made me bless my broken leg twice. I never would have met him, if not for the injury._

"_No Doctor Cullen I actually was referring to you yourself. You are a wonderful doctor, It would be a shame for our town to miss you so soon after acquiring your magnificent services." _

_He smiled again as we reached the open archway in the hospital's halls where we had to part ways, he had never gone into the sunlight around me. Most of the town suspected he was a vampire, but I thought it was just the bigotry of small town life, certainly Doctor Cullen was much too beautiful to be a child of the night, he had a skin sensitivity. _

"_I regret to inform you ms. Platt that my son and I will be moving on soon, I'm afraid we only stayed for your broken leg. I was originally only here for a conference that ended many weeks ago. Aside f\rom that I believe we have overstayed our welcome." It was marveling to me how he had seen through all their fake smiles and politeness so easily, I had known our entire town all my life and I still had trouble spotting the imposters. It gave me a secret shiver of joy to know he had inadvertently admitted to me that the only reason he stayed was for me, and concern for my medical condition. _

"_That really is an unfortunate turn of events Doctor Cullen, I wish you well on your travels though." I quickly turned away to run home. His hand caught my face sharply, like a slap, when I turned to ask him what I had done he was as far away he could get without being rude. _

"_I'm sorry ms. Platt but you should go." My heart smarted worse than my face with that remark. _

"_I'm sorry Doctor Cullen" He was by my side again in an instant, touching my face in excruciatingly gentle movements of his hand. Smoothing my rebellious curls behind my ear, he spoke so softly yet I felt my ears burning off with the tenderness of his words._

"_Do not be sorry Esme, never be sorry for your fragility, never be sorry for your weakness." His hand came in contact with the sun, for just a moment, one beautiful, sparkling moment, when I belived his hand was actually glittering in the sun. It was the heat, I later thought, just a scalding day. In retrospect it had been so ardent that his touch had cooled me, his skin was not cold and hard. _

_**1921 **_

I awoke with a start as the baby began kicking. I had not dreamed of Carlisle for many years. It unnerved me that I was doing so mere weeks before my child was to be born. My nanny Amaria would always tell me that you only dreamed of someone if you were going to meet them again and while I desperately wanted to see the extraordinary man again I was sure he would be appalled by my condition. If he saw me living alone, pregnant none the less he might try to take me home.

I could not go home. I would not go home. They would not force me back to my husband. They would not force _my _child back to that monster. I would never let my child feel the pain of a beating. The devil would have to kill me first.

I felt strange as I stood up, there was a slight pain in my abdomen and a moisture between my legs, it wasn't odd I was tending to sweat more and more as the summer months got more intense though it was very uncomfortable.

I became worried as the pain intensified when I rose to get a glass of water. Before I even understood what happened I was on the floor propping myself up on my knees and palms. I had never experienced such agony, my stomach trembled with the force of contractions. I tried to tamp down my cries though I was sure I could be heard miles from where I was. My body trembled as though it were glass absorbing the impact of a boulder. I was sure my body would break apart from the sheer force of my quivering. I crawled to the door, not realizing blood fell from me until my hands were already clasping around the knob. My own screams deafened my ears. The door flew open, I sprawled onto the floor splayed in all directions.

My neck burned with the cold touch that assaulted me. I had only felt one hand like that before. Amaria had been right.

"Carlisle" I moaned out his name in a desperate mewl. The hands working over me stopped for only a second, then he was working over me again. He picked me up gently in his arms of granite and brought me to the bed. I wondered absently where Edward was, he had almost never left Carlisle's side except when he was working at the hospital.

The cold air was refreshing as he lifted my nightgown to examine me.

"Ms. Platt I need you to push for me." My mind fogged over to the pain, I was barely coherent at all. I felt I would pass out if this continued for much longer. I could barely remember why I was even in so much pain.

"Mrs. Platt you need to push." I tried to remember who this man was, he hiked my skirt up to such an indecent length, He was not even my husband. Or was he my husband? Was I married? I couldn't remember.

"Ms. Platt." I was losing myself, my eyes fluttered close, eyelashes tickling my cheek.

"Ms. Platt." The noise was sharp, but I couldn't understand it, my body ached so horribly.

"_**Esme**_!" My body bowed into itself with the force of it's own spasm. I remembered now. I had to think clearly. My baby was going to come out. He wanted to meet me, he needed me.

Carlisle needed me too push.

My eyes flew open locking into Carlisle's golden orbs. I couldn't breath as he stared at me. The baby shifted causing another ripping pain through my lower abdomen. I forced myself to keep looking at him. I knew that given half the chance he would leave me again. I would not let him leave me. I screamed with enough force to rattle the walls. I pushed and pushed until I was sure my eyes were bulging and my sweat was drowning me. Carlisle lifted a small creature from under me. It was so tiny, so utterly small I couldn't understand it. The umbilical cord was severed and Carlisle cleaned the baby.

Afterwards he handed me my child, I couldn't breathe for what seemed like years. This small thing was mine, all mine. He was perfect. The most beautiful person I had ever seen even more stunning than Carlisle. It must have been impossible to love someone so much that you'd never even seen before. My child wrapped his tiny fingers around my pinky, they barely made it around once. He didn't even cry as I gently cuddled him. I was afraid I'd break him in my huge arms.

"Congratulations." The small whisper in my ear had my heart pounding. His affect on me was powerful, even after all this time. I was weak after he spoke my arms trembled under strain of holding the baby. Carlisle noticed and gently laid the baby in the crib next to my bed. I had just bought it last Tuesday, the nursery was in shambles I had thought I had so much time. Carlisle laid me down gently into the bed quickly cleaning me while inadvertently examining me. I caught his wrist as he was walking to the still open door. He must have let me catch him for I felt he was incredibly stronger than me. Now my pale hand was the one who looked tiny compared to his strong cold arms. I looked into his eyes and found the depths of centuries weighing down reflecting back at me.

"Please don't leave me. I need you here to help us." I pleaded desperately for him to stay, I was beyond my own embarrassment I was too exhausted to care. He didn't answer, didn't make any promises just gently pried my hand from his wrist and told me to sleep, so I slept.

When I woke up again I heard my baby's voice for the first and last time. He screamed and yelled and writhed in his crib. I saw a doctor leaning over him. Carlisle must have asked someone to fill in for him. I suppose it would have stung more had my baby not been dying. I rushed to the baby's side and waved my hands in a panicked rush.

"What's wrong with my baby? What's wrong?" He waved me away and tried to make me leave my baby.

"Tell me what's going on!" His tiny face was turning purple. He couldn't breathe.

"Why can't he breath? What happened? He was fine when Carlisle was here! What did you do?" I screamed at the man like a hell born fury. He was hurting my baby, killing my child. He had been fine until Carlisle left. It was all this man's fault that my baby was dying. I screeched and shoved him away from the crib.

I picked up my beautiful baby clutching him wildly to my chest. I couldn't let him die, my child had to live. He would live, he would be good. He's everything to me. He must live. He's mine all mine. He had to stay he couldn't leave me.

I was still holding him to my chest as the doctor told me to drop the dead baby.


	2. Carlisle

Carlisle

I had been hunting for hours, trying to find any easy game in this measly woods, when I saw her. It was Esme from Columbus. I thought for sure she would be with her new born. He seemed to have a slight plague of asthma, but it did not seem too serious as long as Doctor Vemer treated the baby the way I had told him to.

I had needed to leave the night before. She had smelled so wonderful, so tempting, I could not have betrayed Edward or myself by devouring her or her son. Aside from that she must have noticed my eyes, my skin, and certainly the fact that I had no pulse when she grabbed my wrist. I was about to leave her to her thoughts when I heard the rhythmic steps of her run. I spun quickly but for once in my long life I was too late Esme plummeted off the cliff to the cold beach hundreds of feet below.

My heart had not beat for 257 years yet I felt as if it were going to rip out of my chest as I saw her fall. I ran off the cliff determined to save her. I forgot to keep up my human charade as I heard a sickly series of pops on the ground. She would die slowly, being in retched pain for hours at least, possibly days.

I was at her side as soon as my feet touched the ground. I could smell internal bleeding under her skin. Her torso felt like a lump of dough with marbles in it. Her rib cage was shattered.

"He's dead Carlisle." Even I could barely make out the words almost mouthing from her lips. Any human would have easily missed it.

"Who's dead Esme?" I had a horrible feeling. I could not even think the words. "My baby is dead Carlisle. I didn't even get to name him, but he's still dead. I was going to name him Carlisle. He was going to be you." She made a contorted sound that might have been a laugh and splattered blood onto the grey sand. The true red stood out against such a bland background.

I could not let her end like this. She was much too good for this.

I lifted her into my arms with the utmost care unable to cause her even the slightest whisper of pain. Edward would be undoubtedly upset but he would have to understand. Esme drifted into unconsciousness on the way to the house. I let her down on the most comfortable thing in the house, the couch we only used for showing to guests.

Esme's skin looked so soft, I wondered how it would taste when I bit into her neck. The first slide of my teeth into her soft flesh was pure bliss. I could not have asked for such a wonderful meal. The warm liquid flowing sated me and I gently let Esme lie back against the couch trying to make her as comfortable as possible for the torture she would have to endure.

Esme was already screaming by the time Edward arrived home. He was infuriated by my decision I didn't even try to explain what had happened I merely told him she was too good to die like that.

"But what if she turns on us Carlisle. You know I would stay with you through anything, but I don't think you could kill her if she becomes a problem."

"If she turns then it will be her choice." I waved him away and tried to shift Esme into some semblance of a comfortable position.

I saw the first glimpse of her red eyes today. She was ravenous and ate three deer before she calmed down. Her manner is erratic and strange, consistent with Edward's first behaviors. She is very strong and often overwhelms me, but Edward and I can hold her down together.

When the autopsy report came for her baby I burned it. She would not need such things to upset her, yet I felt guilty for hiding it form her. Maybe one day when she would be older I could tell her.

She lost control and devoured a child today. I had never known a vampire could cry until she started to sob into me. The action was so human I had to hold her to me, I regret causing her so much pain, turning her into a monster.

Esme is starting to retain information. She is becoming more human by the week.

Esme looked at me today, it was different form any other time she had ever seen me before as a vampire. She had been outraged by our lifestyle at first, but now I believe she is coming to peace with herself. Esme has taken to mothering Edward as her own child. She rather enjoys the experience. I believe he is growing fond of her as well. We shall see how this all pans out, but I believe changing Esme has been for the best.


	3. Kiss

Esme

_**1931 **_

I watched Carlisle discreetly as he was working over a medical report for some old woman in town. I had to admire how gracefully he moved just filing papers. It was the kind of things I usually noticed of him. My gentle infatuation from childhood had blossomed into a genuine love for the man. Carlisle would never make the first move. He was an even more old fashioned gentleman than most would think of him. I wanted desperately to kiss that beautiful porcelain face that sparkled for me even on the darkest of nights. I had a reputation for being a patient hunter but I was nothing compared to Carlisle. He could outwait a herd that was five miles away while walking through a sea of humans. I envied his near perfect control.

"Is there something you need ms. Platt?" I frowned at the use of my last name. we had been traveling together for ten years. I grew increasingly frustrated at his casual use of my last name, yet it was almost a sin to call me Esme. I didn't understand why. I called him Carlisle ,how was it wrong to call me Esme?

I walked casually over to the desk trying to show no fear. Predators always knew when you were scared and I had not come over here to have Carlisle coddle me because he thought I was afraid.

"Not really _Mr. Cullen _I was just wondering when we planned on moving to the next town. You're too young to try pushing 29 this year." He looked up slightly at the use of his last name, but dismissed it quickly.

"We shall be moving in the next few months Ms. Platt." I do not know what possessed me to provoke him further, however it happened.

"Really Mr. Cullen , because I believe we should move sooner. Edward is getting restless" I leaned over his desk as much as prudence would allow. Again he looked up at his last name. I wondered if it bothered him as much as it was starting to delight me.

" No I should think we'll be ousted anytime soon." His attempt at a joke was supremely obvious. Carlisle is not a normally funny man. He was nervous around me.

"Well Mr. Cullen it is your decision." He finally got annoyed with the third time.

"Is there a problem Ms. Platt? Are you angry? You seem to be calling me by my last name instead of my first." Carlisle stated the obvious like no one else could.

"No Mr. Cullen, you just call me Ms. Platt so I assumed you wanted me to call you Mr. Cullen or Dr. Cullen if you prefer. If you wish me to stop calling you Mr. Cullen perhaps you should call me Esme." I sauntered over to the door trying to hide my smile at his embarrassed expression.

"Uh, Esme would you please wait." I was so shocked I held absolutely still for a moment. When my brain became composed again I walked calmly over to behind his desk where he was filing papers. "Yes Carlisle?" The feeling in my voice was unmistakable. It had been years since I lusted over something other than blood. Carlisle looked up from his busy work to face me.

"Why were you calling me Mr. Cullen, honestly, why were you?" He shut the cabinet and inched closer to me, again only as prudence allowed.

"I wanted something different to happen. I was tired of being referred to indifferently." I downcast my eyes, afraid of the expression lurking in his.

"Is that what you think that I am indifferent to you?" I nodded just barely. He lifted my chin delicately.

"I think you better leave now."

"Why?" I felt the urge to breathe out harshly and did.

"Because if you don't I'm going to do something you'll probably regret." His fingers slid around my jaw line only to tangle into my hair.

"Why don't you let me decide that for myself?"

"Because you are an irrational being, searching for reason in absolute chaos."

"What if I found a reason? What would you do then?"

" I would have to know what that reason is." he inched ever torturously closer.

"You. It's always been you. Always and forever." I finally let my eyes lock into his and it was exactly like the night he delivered my baby. An undeniable, unequivocal, stronger than death connection was forged between us and I knew it was balancing on a knife edge. If he refused me I was going to leave, but if he did what I knew he should do there were thoughts to be had.

"Please Carlisle don't be ashamed of your weakness, never be sorry for your fragility." I whispered softly to him, daring him to take that one step over the edge like he had to save me.Amazingly he took the leap, right into me.

Our lips met in a melting rush of heat. His kiss was going to kill me. It was a maddeningly slow crush of bodies together. His tongue tentatively brushed against my lips almost seemingly by accident however I opened my mouth to encompass his sweet tasting tongue. Carlisle pulled me closer, trying for all the world to fuse our atoms together. I wrapped my legs around his waist making an iron grip that no one could break. His hands groped my bottom making me squeak slightly. Carlisle's lips attacked my neck making me moan in pleasure. Apparently Carlisle had not been as patient as I'd thought. He sat me down on the desk and we continued kissing, almost making the room burn with the fire of our lust.

He groaned as an orderly knocked politely on his door.

I maneuvered gracefully off the desk and away from Carlisle.

"We'll continue later Esme?" He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me back to him carefully not making too much noise.

"Of course." I nodded smiling at him.

He spun me around quickly giving one more kiss to my waiting mouth. I saw forever in that kiss, forever with Carlisle. I was still grinning as I intertwined my fingers with his and went to face the orderly.


End file.
